There’s more to being the Host than just paying. Decide from the start and make it clear if you expect to split the bill, or if you’ll be the Host and intend to pay for the bill.  

Here is a best-practice list to follow when you are doing the inviting.  And then below there are certain guidelines for the Guest to remember when dining out.  And still further below is my notable recommendation of the fabulous restaurant and the delightful culinary experience (10/10) where the “awkward” took place.

Some tips to follow if you’re the Host:

1. Make it clear that you are the host when inviting the Guest. Say something like, “Will you be my Guest for lunch?”.
   NOTE: If, however, you want to split the bill (then there would be no Host nor Guest) you could say, “Do you want to meet for lunch next week?” If you aren’t sure if it’s clear, after sitting down at the restaurant BEFORE you place the order, ask, “Shall we split the bill?”
2. As the Host you will choose the restaurant, one that you think your (vegetarian?) Guest will appreciate, and make reservations for a day and time that works for everyone
3. If being guided to the table the Host follows the Guest. On the other hand, if there is no one to guide you to the table, the Host should lead the way followed by the Guest
4. The Host will tell the Guest which seat they should take at the table; normally the seat with the best view
5. The Host will make menu suggestions for the Guest. Three-courses are standard (starter, main and dessert) 
6. If the Guest orders only one or two courses, the Host should follow suit and order the same number of courses
7. Since the Host did the inviting and chose the restaurant the Host pays the bill, discretely. Ideally the Host would speak with the server in advance to have the bill brought directly to the Host at the table, or better yet not have the bill brought to the table at all; the Host could leave their credit card with the server in advance and have only the receipt brought to the table 

Guidelines for the perfect Guest:

1. Do not be late
2. Dressing appropriately shows respect for your Host
3. Respect also means that everyone at the table should turn off their phones and keep them off of the table. Everything personal, which in not part of the place setting or part of the meal, should be kept off of the table; this includes your glasses, sunglasses, keys, wallet, handbag, etc.
4. Wait for cues from the Host on what to order, keeping in mind to try matching course for course with others at the table. This ensures everyone at the table has a dish in front of them at the same time.  A small starter can match with the larger starter of someone else. 
5. Don’t order an alcoholic drink unless the Host suggests it
6. Be polite to the server
7. Acceptance is the key word. The Guest should allow the Host to take the lead for everyone at the table when communicating with the staff, for example if the table needs another bottle of water, or another bottle of wine, or if asking to close the window
8. As a Guest, never ever complain about the quality of the food or the service
9. The Guest does not interfere with the Host when paying the bill
10. The Guest should acknowledge and thank the Host at the end of the meal and thank the Host a second time with a written note or an email, whichever you feel is most appropriate. 

Whether for Social or for Business, when these guidelines are followed the overall dining experience will be more relaxed and enjoyable for everyone, because you’ll know what’s expected of you.

Are you doing anything for self-improvement this summer?  Email or text me to organize a chat to discuss how I might help bring you up to speed on all things Etiquette: dining, social, workplace expectations, and customer service.  I offer courses for school age children that will boost their confidence when navigating the adult dining table, and will help them grasp a better understanding of what being polite means.

Quinntessential Etiquette offers bespoke courses
for groups and individual throughout the year

www.QuinntE.com

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Reservations are recommended to ensure a delightful dining experience on the terrace, or inside at …

Café-Restaurant au Vieux Navire
rue du Village 6c – 1164 Buchillon 

Because of rain our terrace reservation with a view of the lake at Au Vieux Navire in Buchillon was transferred inside, into the lovely quaint atmosphere which mimics the likes of a polished old-Parisienne café.  The menu has a wide range of French fares, and our table chose to order different variations of their delicately prepared filets de perche.  I believe my choice, filets de perch with tomatoes and fine herbs served with sautéed vegetables, is truly the best I have ever tasted.  Delectable!  

And then for dessert, crêpes suzette …  oh la la ! C’est manifique !  The sensational twenty-minute table-side preparation gives visual drama and olfactive anticipation, which also allows time to gently digest the fabulous main courses before we were to tuck in again.  A large shiny copper skillet, balanced on an open flame, melts a mountain of sugar with mandarin-size balls of bright yellow butter laced with orange zest. While simmering, fresh orange juice is added to the bubbling mixture before the prepared crêpes are placed into it and blanketed with the sauce.   Grand Marnier, la pièce de résistance, is added last and then dramatically set aflame to the delight of everyone in the restaurant. The crêpes suzette are served with a small dollop of vanilla ice-cream; be sure to accept when asked.  Expectations were deliciously exceeded.

The staff is very accommodating, friendly, and they work in unison to maximize the clients’ experience.

The entire atmosphere and the quality of the food at Café-Restaurant au Vieux Navire earns a 10/10 from me.  With tip we each paid 85 CHF for three generous courses and three bottles of sparkling water.  Let me know your experiences in the comment section below.  Bon appetit!